disappointment.

You know, I’ve experienced disappointment many times in my life; not getting jobs I wanted, not being able to afford this or that, not getting the guy I wanted in high school, etc, etc (good thing about the guy though:-). None of that though was like what I am experiencing right now. This is the deep, aching disappointment that sucks the life right out of you and makes you sick to your stomach.

There is this person that I met several years ago. I usually pride myself on being a good judge of character and thought that this person had their whole life ahead of them and it would be a wonderful one. They are beautiful, smart, great personality, loving family and good upbringing. Throughout the years, I have seen this person blossom, then fall and make a few mistakes. I still always felt this person could be anything and would kick butt doing it.

Fast forward to this year.

I happened across some pictures of this person engaging in activities that I would have never dreamed of. My heart sunk and my soul hurt. I felt my trust had been violated and felt almost as if I had been slapped in the face. There went my supposed ability to accurately gage character.

I know as Christians, we are not to judge others lest we be judged ourselves and I am trying really hard not to judge and just pray. I hurt though, not only for my own feelings, but those of the innocent ones that have been drug along with the choices. I feel for the parents and especially the child of said person. I also fear for the safety. The current activities are not safe and I love them too much, to see them hurt.