the BIG picture

Here lately, I have been stressing about everything (although the changes I blogged about have been helping). The move, my job, the TDY, my health, buying a house, making new friends, leaving old ones, Vegas schools, crime, etc, etc.

The biggest I think though lately is my self image and self expectations. I am mad at myself for gaining 10 pounds back from my lowest that I worked so hard to get to. I am mad at myself for not being able to get past 4 miles running when I was up to 6 regularly last year. I am frustrated at being tired all the time and letting the sugar addiction back in.

Today, I was listening to Sirius – The Message on the way to base and Johnny Diaz’s “More Beautiful You” came on. Can we say reality check?! I am adding more stress to my plate by being mad about all these things when I really need to step back and focus on the big picture.

For starters, I have went from this…

 

To this…

 

Even if I never get those 10 pounds BACK off, I have come a very LONG way.

And, as for the running, I just need to accept that I have cancer and while that may not cripple me, there will be days I can only make 1 mile and there may be days I can make 6. I need to enjoy it again, instead of beating myself up that I didn’t go far enough or fast enough. Who am I running for anyway? Myself or someone else?

This is not to say that I will never battle the “beating myself up” battle again. I think we all go through times like that for one reason or another, but we really need to try to step back and focus on what is truly important, the big picture!

10 Comments

  1. Jim Bennett

    Good for you Lacey,to occasionally step back and enjoy what you have done.You
    look great in pictures and in person.

  2. Lonicera

    Lacey, you’ve gone from pretty to beautiful, from (probably) not paying much attention to your health to being intensely focussed and likely to outlive us all, not to mention being a super-mum and the most supportive of army wives (I know from friends in the UK how hard it is to fulfill this role here, and no doubt it’s the same in the US). To cap it all you also seem to work for the good of your community. And all of this is done on your own most of the time. So you have every reason to allow yourself to stand back and think about how much you’ve achieved – and then forgive yourself for the bits that are slightly less achievable.
    Caroline

  3. elizabeth

    You know what, I think we all go through stuff like this and you are an inspiration from start to yet to be finished Lacey! The Lord isn’t finished yet, you just wait and these times will grow shorter and shorter friend!
    e.

  4. Bryan

    You know….I’ve seen you go through rough times and as I sit here reading this, it makes me realize even more how much I love you.

    You persisted through tough times when it seemed that there was no light at the end of the tunnel. Through the years of our marriage, you never gave up on me when I was being difficult or bull-headed. It takes a real woman to marry a man like me…heck you were even warned before we got married that I would be a handful.

    Now that we have made it through the tough times, you have become more of a woman than I ever thought I deserved or could handle.

    Thank you for being my wife and friend!

    P.S. I LOVE THOSE BOOTS!

    Bryan

  5. Mary

    wow Lacey you have done amazing! You have always been an inspiration to me! You are wonderful and will be missed when you move to NV!!!!! I Love the boots too!!!

  6. Dasha Drown

    Wow!! I am so inspired!! I also have the lapband, I got mine on Feb 9th, 2006. You look amazing!! I found you on MyFitness Pal :) Hope you don’t mind I follow your blog!

Thoughts?