back on track.

I am going to be honest here. I have hidden it for the last few months behind smiles, but I am not smiling inside.

I have fallen…hard. Since September, I gained 13 pounds, I am now down to only 10.2 but still, 13 pounds! My total lack of caring has erased 5 months of hard work. 5 months of bettering myself and feeling good about my self. Why?

Sure, I could blame it on stress, I mean we do have TDYs, PCS, budget and job changes in the near future. I had the stress of working at a church during Christmas AND amidst a huge renovation project.

But, I don’t think it was that. I think I just gave up. Took on a “why bother” attitude.

I think I have been spending too much time comparing myself to everyone else and their losses compared to mine. Then, I read a verse today that really hit me.

“Do your own work well, and then you will have something to be proud of. But don’t compare yourself with others.” Galatians 6:4 (CEV)

I am really hard on myself, hence why none of my weight loss attempts before the band would work. One mess up and I gave up. Not this time though. I am done “giving up” and done comparing myself to others. Sure, I am still going to screw up, that is human nature but the only failure is giving up. I need to realize that I have less to lose now, so it IS going to be slower and that although you can’t tell by looking at me from the outside, I am an active leukemia patient. It is there everyday affecting every part of my body. I need to “man up” to this fact and simply do the best *I* can do.

So, I am officially getting back on track.

What does this mean for me? Well, for starters…

  • Tracking my food, good or bad
  • Opening up my food diary and being accountable to “anyone”, see it here
  • Drinking at least 8 glasses of water a day
  • Exercising at least 3x a week, even if my fatigue only allows a 10 minute walk – I was successful last week and this week, although I have discovered my body can’t handle the 3 days in a row I have been doing
  • Stay at my calorie goal at least 6 days a week
  • Allow myself 1 day a week that I can go over by 500 max
  • Not allow snacks/desserts in the house that are more than 250 calories, those have to be gone “out” for

These aren’t hard goals, but I do need to get back in sync with them. I did them easily for 14 months and I CAN do them again.

 

7 Comments

  1. elizabeth carney

    Lacey I admire your honesty and I think we can all relate to this, even though it is your story and life. Your sharing brings hope to many, including myself and that along with where you are is what it is all about!!

    Even though we all fall, I am proud of you and where you have taken your path. I will be praying for you to not beat yourself up, but to enjoy where you are and the fact that today is a new day!

    Blessings friend!
    e.

  2. Amy

    It is hard ya know. I can gain 7 pounds over the course of a week or so if I go crazy…and it sucks bc I am back tracking and undoing weeks of hard work. It doesnt seem right that it takes forever to lose it and a blink to gain it back. You have overcome a lot in these last couple of years and I know you can do this. I think you know it. I think you are amazing.

  3. Senorita Bandita

    I agree with Amy (you are amazing). I really like your plans and how they are concrete but not too hard to achieve. I really love the idea of a six-day rule and the no desserts over 250 calories. I don’t think I’ve heard those before this post.

    Anyhow, good luck in meeting them and losing again. I know you can do it.

  4. Lynn

    Falling down is just a part of life. It is how we deal with it once we have fallen that dictates whether we are a success or need to work on it some more. You are obviously a success because you stood up, dusted off your knees, and put a plan in place. I am so very proud of you…you need to be proud of you!

Thoughts?